Friday, July 21, 2017

July 21, 2017: 4:30 AM

My legs are aching and I can't sleep.  I had physical therapy today plus I did the recumbent elliptical machine.
Last night I slept well.  But the night before I had the same aches, though not as bad.  I had PT on this day, too.

I think the problem stems from the pain from physical therapy.  I've taken advil, tylenol and even an oxycodone.  But the pain continues and makes my legs jittery.  Laying down makes my legs throb more.

I don't need to get up tomorrow morning until almost noon.  My dog walker, Tracy picks up Sweetsie at noon.

I felt so good today after a full 8 hours of sleep.  I wish I knew what to do to get to sleep tonight.  I've aways been more of a morning person.  I hate sleeping in past 9 AM.  Then it seems like I've missed the entire day.

Thursday, July 20, 2017

July 20, 2017

Not many of my decorations and wall art made it over to my current apartment.  I'm limited on crafting supplies, too.

But I had lots of colored paper in my filing cabinet.  I looked through Pinterest for some ideas of what I could make with paper to decorate my apartment.  I cut butterfly shapes from paper of varying shades of pink and orange.

I  bought double-sided tape, glue and black foam core board from Fred Meyers to complete the project.

I drew a large J on the black foam core board and followed the shape with my butterflies.  It's came out very colorful and cheerful.  It makes me happy to look at it.

I might just have to go out and buy some fabric.  I want to make a new basket for my walker.  The one I have now is a little small for Sweetsie.  She's wiggly in the basket and has broken one side.  I don't have the fabric or thread to make one.  Guess I have to go shopping.....

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

July 18, 2017

I went to Fred Meyers on the Russelville bus yesterday.  The bus driver put my walker outside the east building.  When the bus arrived at the store he brought over a grocery cart.  I put Sweetsie in the cart on top of a towel that I brought along.

There was an employee at the door who told me that Sweetsie couldn't ride in the cart.  Someone had complained about dogs in the carts being unsanitary.  Does one person's complaint make the rules?

I tried to have Sweetsie walk beside the cart.  Her leash kept getting tangled up in the wheels. I tried holding her.  I couldn't handle that.  So, I held Sweetsie with my arms resting on the handle of the cart.  I was getting exhausted but I wanted to find the things on my list.

Finally I had to put Sweetsie in the cart.  No other store employee said anything to me.  We were probably in the store for over an hour.

Sweetsie and I got back on the bus.

The driver stowed our groceries.  The other riders told me that we are supposed to bring large bags with handles so it would be easier for the driver.  It would have been nice if such information was posted in the newsletter or information packet.  

That little trip to the store exhausted me.  I went to bed at 9 PM and actually fell asleep.  I slept till 9 the next morning.  

I have to catch one of the bus drivers to ask about their routes on the doctor appointments days - Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays.  Next week I have an appointment with my surgeon.  His office is not on the list of destinations.  But it is nearby.  If I can't take the bus, there is always uber. 
Hopefully, the doctor will say it is okay for me to drive.  Then I can go where I want, especially visit the kids.  I just have to be careful.  I get tired so easily.  It is taking forever to get my strength back.

This is a picture of my apartment door.  The little Mexican doll is one of the odd bits that escaped the storage unit.

I bought a plat of hydroponically grown grass for Sweetsie.  It lasts a couple of weeks.  But Sweetsie has no interest in using it.  I was hoping that she would use it in the mornings.  It would be so nice to have a cup of coffee before having to get dressed and take Sweetsie outside.  

Stella enjoys eating the grass.

If I get a condo, it has to have a patio.  I'll put a couple plats of grass on it.  Maybe Sweetsie will use the grass since it would be outside.  Or maybe I can find a small house with a yard to buy.

I keep looking at property online.  But, I can't go look at it.  After I can drive again I go look at places in person.  The photos online do not provide enough information about the property.  One place looked great online but it was on a steep hill.  I need to live where there is no sharp incline.  It's difficult in Portland since it's hilly here.

I will need to remain in Russelville, the retirement home while I continue to recuperate.  There's no way I could do all the tasks necessary for total independent living.  It's hard enough living here and taking care of myself.  I need to remain patient and heal.

July 16, 2017

It's 1:30 AM.  I was sleepy at 11 PM, took Sweetsie out and went to bed.  It didn't last.  I couldn't turn off my brain.  So, I'm back in the living room.

I took 2 tylenol PM and a pain pill at 11:30.  My thoughts were all over the place- Houston, Mama, married life, playing cards, etc.  I don't know what to do to make myself fall asleep.  My legs weren't even jittery tonight.

I want to get up early tomorrow so I can take the Russellville bus to Walmart at 10:30 AM.  If I can't get up in time I can always take the bus to Fred Meyers at noon.  I need a bunch of little things.  If I go on Amazon to buy them I know I'll get distracted by the "suggested purchases" and spend too much.

I'm going to start making stuff.  Crafting makes me feel like I'm being productive.  I'm working on a large decorative "J" to decorate the apartment.  I have tons of decorations packed up in my storage unit.  I have a few odd bits here now.  A birdhouse, Kliban cat piggy bank, the store mannikin that I decoupaged and a crewel project from the '70's are some of the weird items that didn't go into storage unit.  I'll post photos of this place soon.

99% of my fabric stash and oodles of craft supplies are all in storage.  I have to get some glue and poster board .  It kills me to buy things that I already own but are inaccessible.

Thursday, July 13, 2017

July 12, 2017

Today I managed to escape from the retirement home for a couple of hours.  I had a senior helper come over today.  I was going to have her help me put my stuff away.  But, Tomoko did that for me last week.  (Thank you, Tomoko!)

So, instead we went shopping.  My helper, Judy, drove me to the bank and the grocery store.  The grocery store, Fred Meyer's, is huge.  It sells everything from clothes to yogurt.

Sweetsie came with us.  She wanted to be carried so much.  Instead of being my comfort animal, I've become hers.  She has become so nervous from the bus accident and then 6 or so weeks living with Kevin's family.  Now she wants to be with me constantly.

I'm nervous about leaving her in the apartment by herself.  I don't want her barking and crying.   Hopefully, she'll calm down with time.  She is adjusting well to being here.  I get up in the morning, put clothes on and take her on a short walk.  Then we go upstairs and I feed her and Stella.  About 4 hours later her dog walker shows up.  She doesn't even want to leave me to go on a nice walk with her.

It's 11 PM now and I have to take her out for her last potty break.

We're back now.  Sweetsie was great.  I took her out to the courtyard, let her loose and she did her business and was ready to go back inside.

Unfortunately, I don't sleep well here.  It's probably the pain.  I have to really get into a deep sleep so I don't wake up if I move my leg.  It's 1:30 AM.  I was in bed for about an hour, woke up and couldn't get comfortable.  So, I'm back in the living room.

Someday I have hopes of being pain free.  At this point it seems like just a dream.  My world has been turned upside down.  I'm in the 4th place I've slept in since I moved to Portland.  First, it was 3 nights in the apartment in Marvel 29, then the hospital, next the nursing home and now the retirement home.  I can't even dream of being back at home in Houston.  It seems like my former life happened ages ago.  Like I've said before this accident has made me feel years older.

I started physical therapy yesterday - at last.  I was supposed to get therapy from the company that owns the nursing home. I called and left messages but no one ever returned my calls.  I was able to change to the therapist who has an office in this same retirement home.  I was really hurting after the first session.  My second one is tomorrow.

Tomorrow I'm also going to an internal medicine doctor's office.  My first appointment is with the nurse practitioner.  Maybe the patients have to be pre-screened before you get to see a doctor.  I don't need any prescriptions filled.  I think it's a good thing to find a doctor in case I get sick.  I only know trauma doctors in Portland now.

I guess I'll try to go to sleep again.

Saturday, July 8, 2017

July 8, 2017

I'm still working on putting my things away in my new apartment.  Everything I try to do exhausts me.  This injury is really kicking my ass.

My body is (hopefully) busily growing back the bone and muscle that the accident took away from me.  Plus, I still have lots of pain.  Standing hurts, sitting hurts, laying down hurts, etc. etc.  My mother used to tell me that pain saps your strength.  She was definitely right.

I've been thinking about my Mom a lot lately.  There are so many residents here that remind me of her.  Plus, I think back to how my Mom took care of me back in the '80's when I had major surgery.  She would be telling me right now "stop trying to do so much and sit down and rest."  Plus she'd tell me to eat properly.

Eating properly is pretty easy here.  Some meals are included in the rent.

Sweetsie is here with me for a trial reunion.  She fits into the basket in my walker.  I put her there when I have to go through a no dogs allowed area.

She is such good company.  I got up and dressed this morning already and took her for a short walk.  She barely made it out the front door and had to pee right on the sidewalk.

I take her on the leash to the elevator.  But when we return upstairs if no one is around I let her loose. She runs down the hall and back to me and runs some more.

I think I will complain to the management about the lack of dog bags here.  I pay pet rent and there are no pet amenities.  There is no place set aside for dogs here and no disposal bags.  Marvel 29 said that my pet rent there went for the disposal bags and emptying the special can.  The disposal bags here are down in front of the apartment complex next door.  It is not associated with Russellville Park.

Yesterday I had the "concierge" drive me to PetSmart.  The "concierge" is a young woman who drives residents around and does errands for them.  Unfortunately her service is not included in the rent.  She waited in the car while I dropped off Sweetsie for her hair cut.

I took Uber on the way back.  I asked the driver to wait and he did.  I tipped him $10 and he said it was rare that he got a tip.  I said I appreciated that he waited for me.  The bill for the trip was over $25.  Maybe I will be able to drive myself the next time Sweetsie needs a hair cut.   It certainly would be the cheaper way to go.  I'll have to take a photo of Sweetsie with her haircut.

I was worried that the trip back to PetSmart would exhaust me so I took a pain pill.  I can easily see how addictive they can be.  When I returned home I had enough energy to clean the apartment some more.  I am only allowing myself an occasional pain pill.  I'm saving them for physical therapy.  I sure wish there was an alternative non-addiction option.  Extra strength Advil takes the sharper edges off the pain but it doesn't give me the ability to do more.

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

July 4, 2017

My furniture finally arrived yesterday.  What a mess I have on my hands now.  So much to put away.
And then after I get better I will most likely be repacking everything and moving to a permanent home.

Getting hit by a bus is costing me a fortune!  I need the extra assistance that I get at the retirement home.  But, it certainly does not come cheap.

I paid almost $7,000 to move to Portland from Houston.  Yesterday the move across town cost me another $1,000.  I have always tried to live frugally and save for my old age.

I feel like my old age is already here.  After Jim's accident I felt like I aged at least 10 years.  Now with my hip and leg injury I feel like I've added another 10 years.  That would work out okay financially, if I had aged actual years.  But, I could have another 30 years to go.  I can't live this way that long.  Needing care is extremely expensive.

Tomorrow I have a "senior helper," Judy coming in for 4 hours.  She worked out well last Wednesday.  I just can't get all the unpacking and arranging done alone.  My whole right leg starts throbbing and I have to rest it.  I certainly don't want to injure myself so I'm taking it slow.

I've opened every box looking for the parts to put my shelves back together.  No luck!  Maybe Marvel 29 held on to them for me.  Otherwise there goes more money.  I like to keep my stuff organized and that means I need shelves to store clothes, shoes, etc. etc.

Stella is having a wonderful time being the only pet.  She'll be mad because Sweetsie is coming on Thursday and Friday.  If I can handle her okay, she can stay with me.  I have to hire a dog walker since I can't walk very far.  I ordered  a plot of real grass for her.  It is hydroponically grown and comes in a cardboard box.  I'm not sure where I can put it in the apartment.  After 2 weeks you toss it it away and get a new one.  It has good reviews.  I think Sweetsie will use it.  Nothing better than dirtying clean grass.

If I had a patio I could use a fake grass one and clean it outside.  It would be too difficult and dangerous for me to try to clean it in the shower.

I have to go clear off my bed so I can go to sleep.  Oh my bed- what heaven to have it again!  First the nursing home had mattresses that were covered in plastic that bunched up and poked me in the back.  Then the cot I had to borrow here was like sleeping on bare springs.

My mattress is nice and cozy.