Friday, December 31, 2010

December 31, 2010

What a year! Lots of ups and downs. Jim was having a wonderful year up until November 24th. He started his own business. He hadn't started earning money yet but he was working hard learning and planning strategies. He was almost ready to conquer the world.

I spent the summer having surgery and recuperating. My torn left achilles tendon was repaired in May. It feels great now. Before the surgery every step I took caused pain. Now I am able to walk down long hospital corridors. In July I had a total knee replacement in my left leg. It is doing well. It could be a whole bunch better if I could continue my physical therapy. I had to give it up to take care of Jim. Now when I am in TIRR's gym watching Jim's therapy I do leg lifts, knee bends and the other exercises that I can remember.

Jim's accident caused the worst tragedy in my life to date. I could have never imagined such a catastrophe. I am so grateful for antidepressants. Without them I would not have made it so far in life. The pain was overwhelming. I have this great imagination. Now I can think of even worse tragedies so it seemed pointless to keep on living. I was sinking into deep depression. Luckily I had the presence of mind to increase the meds. I really hate taking an increased dose because of weight gain. But, if I don't keep up the medicine I will not be able to live and continue to care for Mom and Jim.

I just had the worst birthday that I've ever had. But, I got through it and even accomplished a lot yesterday.

I visited 3 nursing homes yesterday. 2 of them would be okay for Jim. The third one was just horrible. I should go shop around some more next week. I wish there was a nursing home that specialized in rehab. It just sucks that Jim has to leave TIRR so that the insurance company can save money. He is getting so much better there. I worry that he will backslide in a nursing home.

No comments: